The Dreadful Ex

Earlier this week, I received a phone call from a strange number but not too strange.  The phone number was somewhat familiar.  With that thinking in mind, I answered the call.  **normally, I do not answer unsaved numbers in my phone but since it was somewhat familiar, I answered it.**  BIG MISTAKE!!!!  It was my ex and I knew it from the 1st word uttered.  After I said, “hello”, he says, “I got the article you sent to me.  Once I read it I will call you back”.  Before I could say or think anything, he hung up the phone.  I said, “ok”.  He is crazy.  It wasn’t even 5 minutes later and he called me right back.  I did not answer.  He called me again after that with no answer, but this time he left me a 1 minute 16 second message.  Really?  Man, I haven’t talked to you in over 5 years.  WTH?  I listened to the message and it was NOT his voice.  It was a song.  It was Justin Timberlake’s End of Time song.  Now… What in the world do you want from me dude?

Can someone please tell me when you finally know that it is over? Evidently, 5 years isn’t enough time to figure that out.  I am not in the business to have stalkers.  I’m not one so I do not need one myself.  I told one of my guy friends and he told me that “maybe he realized he had a good woman”.  No!  It’s because I blocked him from LinkedIn and he couldn’t just peruse my page anymore.  So, he checked my phone number to see if it was the same and my goofy butt answered the call.  UGH!!!

Look…when I am in a relationship, I am in it 100%.    It’s all or nothing.  I was raised to do for you but leave room for someone to have the ability to come in & be there for you too.  I did all of that but I fell short with the choice that I made.  Then, alcohol played a role in a our relationship’s demise.  It’s time to let go.  If it has been 5 years, then I’m over it and you.   I do the best I can for you and after some time its not reciprocated then what am I going to do? leave.  It is plain and simple.  A relationship is between 2 people not 1.  So, you both have to put in the work.  The work is in every corner not just from one.  We were together for 8 years and that is more than enough time to know what I want and do not want.

I will give him this though.  I learned a lot about myself when I was with him.  It took him to truly see what I could tolerate and what I couldn’t, what I could live with and what I couldn’t.  Sometimes it takes those people to come into your life to learn those things.  At times, it takes trial and error to actually get an understanding not a assumption.  Dating him was a mistake, but a valuable mistake in the end.

The whole point of this is…when it is over and you have been told it is over (with no chance & no feelings), then it is time to move on.  Seriously!!!!  You do you.  Just let go and let God!!!!


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